


Monsters Don't Sleep (Part 5)

by QuietDarkness



Series: Simplicity and Complexity (Harrisco) [36]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-09
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-03-02 21:13:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13326468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuietDarkness/pseuds/QuietDarkness
Summary: Due to the 'bug' and the hypothermia, Harry is in a coma and not recovering. Cisco is determined to save him, no matter the cost.Turning to an 'old friend' may hold the answer, and also gives Cisco some insight to his own strength...'Opposites don't just attract. They catch fire and burn the entire city down.'(Part 36)





	Monsters Don't Sleep (Part 5)

**Author's Note:**

> (Sorry bout the hiccup before, folks. For some reason, the last attempt at posting this chapter didn't have the entire thing! -le gasp- So let's try this again!)

-Audio Log, Harrison Wells-

_I think this is stupid._

_Caitlin insists doing a daily log will help me deal with the 'emotional trauma' I'm bound to feel from my time... over there._ -a sigh is heard, a rustling of clothes, a creak of a chair-

_Honestly, I think it's childish. Talking about it or writing it down isn't going to change anything._

_I told her as much._

-silence, soft machine whirring in the background-

 _But she and Jesse ganged up on me. They have this way of just staring me down. So I promised her I would... give it a shot._ -the last four words were drawn out-

 _Not that I have any clue how to begin. How does anyone even..._ -another sigh- _I need to think some more on this._

-end of Audio Log-

* * *

-Audio Log, Harrison Wells-

 _It's over now. All of it. Zero Point. 714. Even the Watcher. It's all behind me. And this... Change..._ -a cup was settled onto a hard surface-

_It's not just my eyes or the fact that I'm able to heal myself and others. Nor is it the fact that meta abilities don't affect me, but it's something else. Something I've been refusing to come to terms with._

_Yesterday, Cisco and I reconnected. And it was... welcome. Needed._ -there was a softness to his tone, then a slight clearing of his throat-

_But there are still things I can't tell him. Things I want to say, but don't know how._

-a long stretch of silence-

 _How do I tell him that being over there, on 714, damaged something inside of me... something... god, what would you even call it?_ -the cup was picked up, a chair whined as it was leaned back into- 

_It's like a piece of me was hollowed out, left dark... a pit, almost. And I don't know how to fill it. Being back, with everyone, with him has been everything I dreamed of. But I feel like no matter how long I'm home, no matter what good this Change has done to me, or how amazing it feels to be back with Ramon... a part of me will always be stuck in that place..._

_And I'm worried that once he figures out that I'm not... who I used to be..._ -there was a frustrated sound, almost a growl, then a sigh-

 _That I'm not the man he fell in love with... he'll leave. And I wouldn't blame him._ -the sadness was clear in his tone-

-end of Audio Log-

* * *

-Audio Log, Harrison Wells-

_I wonder sometimes... well, frequently, actually... why Ramon loves me, especially after... We've had this conversation, discussed it many times. In fact, he's wondered the same about me. How he could think I wouldn't is confusing. He's... everything I'm not. I've never known anyone with a better soul, a more brilliant mind, a more patient outlook. And how he views the world? It's simultaneously endearing and hopeful. The fact that someone as incredible as him can look at me and see someone worth loving is... miraculous._

_Think about who he is for a moment. Just, just think..._

_He's a comedian, really. Partially the reason why I became so enamored with him to begin with. He made me laugh. Which wasn't simple, especially when we first met. I didn't make it easy on him, I know. I wasn't exactly at my best. But somehow, he still managed to make me smile... in spite of my cantankerous demeanor._

-there was a smile in his tone, easily heard-

_He's also probably the most understanding and forgiving human being in existence, next to Jesse, and that's not even remotely an understatement. I make... bad choices, mistakes... stupid decisions. I get mad, throw things... get on his nerves. But he's still here. Still loving me. Despite every logical reason why he shouldn't._

_And he... he stays. He never gives up. He stands by me, and he hangs on with both hands and I just... I don't deserve him. I don't. But I'll be damned if I let him go without a fight._

_Because I love him. With all I am._

_I don't always know how to tell him, or... even show him. Especially since coming back..._

-a quiet pause-

 _I worry that I don't say or show him enough._ -a very deep sigh- _Jesse would be calling me an idiot about now._

_I don't know what I would do without either one of them..._

-end Audio Log-

* * * 

-Audio Log, Harrison Wells-

_We were all sitting in the living room earlier... myself, Maggie and Ramon, just... watching some sort of reality show that the girl likes, and it was probably the most domestic thing I've done in awhile._

_Of course we eat meals together and share a roof and such._

_But it was domestic in the sense that it wasn't planned, just... a normal occurrence, where we all sort of landed there. Ramon in the chair, myself on the couch and Maggie was sitting cross legged on the floor. She practically demanded I braid her hair. I know it was Ramon who told her that I knew how to do it in the first place._ -there was a small tone of agitation in his voice-

_We bickered over the stupidity of her show, Ramon insisted I let her watch what she wanted, and I just... braided her hair._

_And for a few moments, I felt very strange. Like I didn't belong there. Like that wasn't my place to be. Because it was all so normal. Sometimes, I can't help but feel like that. As though normal isn't what I'm supposed to have. That it isn't what I should be_ allowed _to have._

-there was a meow in the background, the sound of something padding quickly along a tabletop, then a deep sigh-

 _Ramon sensed it, I think, because he moved from the chair to sit beside me. He didn't say anything, just..._ \- another sigh- _He was just there, leaning into me. And it was all I needed._

_To make it better. Whatever this nagging feeling is that keeps popping up every time things feel normal. He's my rock, for lack of a better description. As typical as it may sound._

_Though there's hardly anything typical about Cisco Ramon..._

-end Audio Log-

* * *

-Audio Log, Harrison Wells-

_I'm sitting here, watching him sleep. I do that a lot. He'd probably yell at me for it. But I find a certain kind of peace, knowing Ramon's right here, and being able to see it with my own eyes._

-tone very soft, the slight sound of rain in the background pattering against the windows-

_Normally I wouldn't do these logs in the middle of the night, and especially not within earshot of Ramon, but... I realized something just now, while I was holding him..._

_That hollow in me, that terrible darkness I feel? It's fear._

_On 714, the longer I was there, the more I began to forget. Sensations, smells, sounds. Like the feel of Cisco's hands, the smell of coffee, the sounds of the whole team laughing... little things._

_Not so little... _-a deep sigh-__

____

_I began to lose it all. Bit by bit, as days and nights stretched and melted together, I began to lose them... everyone and everything that means the most to me._

____

_I'm not afraid of dying, or being hurt. I'm not... afraid of all the things that everyone should be afraid of. And I know... I know that that's wrong!_ -his voice rose slightly, then a sound in the background made him pause, a long one, before he continued more softly- 

____

_I'm afraid of forgetting them all. The team and now Maggie, and... and most of all Cisco and Jesse..._

____

_Afraid of losing them._

____

_And surviving it..._

____

-the rain settled into the background for a short while- 

____

_I can't think of a worse hell than that._

____

-end Audio Log- 

____

__* * *_ _

____

__Cisco jammed his finger on the space bar, stopping the logs completely. The relative silence afterward was jarring._ _

____

__He hadn't meant to listen to Harry's personal logs. It was totally by accident. He'd had Maggie bring Harry's laptop to the medlab so he could do something to occupy his brain while keeping vigil over Harry. He'd found a folder on the desktop, unnamed. And all the audiofiles were unnamed. He should have just stopped when he realized what it was he was listening to, but he just... couldn't._ _

____

__The sound of Harry's voice, the personal thoughts, the insight into things Harry wouldn't say to anyone because that just wasn't his way... it had pulled Cisco in, and he was trapped before he knew it. Until it all became too much to hear. Until the words reached down his throat, grabbed his heart and squeezed._ _

____

__He slammed the laptop lid shut and set it aside, and it should have been the end of it. But his chest felt like someone was squeezing his heart in a vice, forcing him to pay for listening to those personal thoughts of Harry's. And that pain bled out in tears, running down his cheeks, a sort of panic attack setting in, breathing so quick he was practically hyperventilating. It was probably the result of a lot of things. Of his own injuries and his worry over Harry and just the situation as a whole. But hearing all those things that Harry had to say... it stopped his brain from being rational, and his body took over. He was desperately trying to get himself under control when Caitlin came rushing back in, worry plastered all over her face._ _

____

__“Cisco?!” She demanded, coming up beside him and grabbing him by the shoulders. He just shook his head at her and reached for her. As confused as she was, she just held onto him, and let him hold onto her till it passed and he could breathe like a normal human being again. It wasn't till she'd helped him get comfortable in his gurney again and sat beside him that he told her what had happened._ _

____

__“I shouldn't have listened. He's going to be so mad.” Cisco said softly, staring across the way at Harry's quiet form. His temperature had risen the last few days. And he no longer had the breathing tube. But he still hadn't woken up. And Caitlin couldn't explain why. His brain was still functioning, but only enough to keep his body alive. Basically, he was in a coma. “But the things he said... Caitlin, I just...” he rubbed his hands over his face, then dropped his arms with a small wince. “Why didn't he tell me?”_ _

____

__“I don't know what he said. But I know Harry well enough to think... maybe he was just trying to figure it all out for himself? Maybe he just wanted to protect you.” She said, absently stroking his forearm. His own wounds were healing, but slowly. His back was so sore, he couldn't lay on it all now. He had to sleep on his side, and even that was iffy. Wally had offered to take a picture of the wounds so he could see, but really... he just didn't want to know what it looked like. Cisco looked at her. She'd been a rock through all this. Holding him together while he tried to hold it together for Jesse and Maggie._ _

____

__“He's always doing that. Protecting everyone.” He frowned a little, “When's he going to let someone save him for a change?” Someone being Cisco, of course. Caitlin smiled knowingly._ _

____

__“Don't you see?” She asked, her hand coming up to tug at Cisco's ponytail as she stood. “You already did. And still do. When he wakes up, ask him. I bet you fifty bucks and a jumbo bag of gummy worms that he'll say the same thing.”_ _

____

__Ah, shit. He smiled lightly at her, then looked down at his hands with a sigh. She was probably right. She was right about a lot of things lately. “I kind of love you, Caitlin Snow.” He said softly, and she kissed him a-top his head._ _

____

__“I kind of love you, too, Cisco Ramon.” Was her honest reply. It was a typical thing between them, said whenever no one was around to hear. Sort of their own private affirmation of what they mean to each other._ _

____

__“Do you think the Watcher knows?” He asked, then, after a moment of quiet, and seemingly out of the blue. But it was something he'd been thinking about. “If this whole hypothermia thing was caused by the Change, then she has to be aware, right?”_ _

____

__“I don't know, Cisco... we haven't heard from or seen her since Harry stopped Zero Point.” She tried to sound less wary about the idea than she probably was. “If she knew, I just... wouldn't she have helped him?” She asked, glancing toward Harry. Cisco looked at him, too._ _

____

__“Maybe...” he mumbled, then reached behind himself and undid his ponytail, letting his hair fall in messy waves. “I just feel so useless, laying here. I should be helping him, doing... something...”_ _

____

__“Everything that can be done is being done. You need to heal, too, Cisco.” She chided him gently, then squeezed his knee. “Harry would be really mad if you didn't take care of yourself. That I do know for sure.” She leaned over and kissed his forehead lightly, then left the room again._ _

____

__For a long, far too agonizingly quiet moment, all Cisco did was stare at Harry._ _

____

__And think._ _

____

__If the Watcher didn't know, maybe... well, maybe she should._ _

____

__“I'm going to help you, Harry.” he whispered, “My way.”_ _

____

__And slowly, painfully, he laid down on his side, closing his eyes. Not to sleep, or even dream. But to land somewhere else, somewhere only he could go, somewhere Harry and he had worked so hard on teaching him to get to. The in-between. It was how he had contacted Caitlin when they were under the influence of the bugs. And even if it hurt, even if it exhausted him, he would find _her_ there, the Watcher, and make damn sure she knew..._ _

____

__Harry needed her help._ _

____

__* * *_ _

____

_He felt... weightless. As though his whole body had no real physical form for gravity to hold on to. Which made sense, considering he was vibing, but also made him feel really unnerved. This... whatever this was... not what he was expecting._

____

_He couldn't see a damn thing. If there was something blacker than black, then he was surrounded by it. But the sound..._

____

_His heartbeat echoed, bouncing off walls he couldn't see. Or maybe not walls. He just assumed they were walls. But whatever they were, they sent the sound of his hammering heart right back to him in waves._

____

_Was this where the Watcher was? Did she live here? Because daaaamn... dismal was not a strong enough word._

____

'No, Cisco. I don't live here.' 

____

_Her voice came from behind him, if there was a 'behind' because honestly... he had no idea what direction anything was. If he was even turning, it didn't register. Until a blue spot came into view. Like a light, or even some sort of glowing orb. Except it got bigger the more he stared at it. He wanted to move toward it, to reach out and touch it. The fact that he couldn't was fricken frustrating!_

____

“What's happening?” _He asked, and he swore he felt his mouth... not-mouth?.. move. Gah, dammit._ “Where are we?” 

____

'You are safe. I have to admit, I was surprised to see you. At first.' _She said, her voice suddenly closer, the orb or spot growing the more she spoke._ 'But I understand now why you're here. I have to give you... props?' _She seemed amused by the word, using their language so easily and yet still finding it strange._ 'Your abilities have come very far since we last met.' 

____

“Yeah, I've had some practice. You know why I'm here?!” _He demanded, wishing he had a tangible form because this strange weightless body-less existence was really beginning to feel disconcerting._

____

'It's all over your thoughts. Harrison is... not doing well.'

____

“Not doing... he's in a coma!” _He found himself growling out._ “He needs help!” 

____

_There was a soft sigh, it echoed around him like wind. But he didn't feel any of it._ 'Cisco...' 

____

“Please! We... Caitlin, she's doing everything she can. But he's not waking up. If you've read my thoughts, you know what happened to him. You can help him! You helped him before!” _He pleaded, his desperation palpable, even without a form to hold it._

____

'I helped him help himself. I helped you help him. I cannot bring him back from where he is now.' 

____

“Wait... where he is now?” _Confusion flushed over him._ “What do you mean, where he is now?” 

____

'The Change, as you call it, aided him when you were under the influence of the bugs. But his brain is still very limited by the rules of a normal human body. The extreme cold, the bug, his injuries... all damaged his brain badly. The hibernation was the Change's way of keeping his brain from dying while it repaired. And the resulting coma, well...' _her voice shifted, moving around him as she spoke,_ 'There are realities, in-betweens as you like to call them... places where all that makes someone who they are can be sent to, in tact, to keep them safe. Whole. Undamaged.' 

____

_He tried very hard to grasp what she was saying._ “So Harry was brain damaged,” _he felt his absent face grimace as he said it, just the sound of the words was terrifying,_ “But the Change healed him, right? And now he's in a coma because... because...” 

____

'Because all that he is, who he is, was sent to one of these places by... the Change.' 

____

“So go there and bring him back, you can... that whole transversing thing you do... and whatever this place is, right? You obviously can go wherever you want!” _He felt a glimmer of a hope. Yeah, he didn't quite understand all this. Harry's mind, spirit, whatever was somewhere else. That much he grasped. It was nuts. Like... batty as a cave. But he had no reason, none whatsoever, to doubt the Watcher. Not after everything she'd done for them._

____

'I can't.' 

____

_Aaand then there was that answer._

____

_Cisco felt his hope flicker._ “No, no don't you say that!” _he blurted._ “Why the hell can't you?!” _He didn't mean to sound so angry but this was Harry! Can't was just not an option!_ "After everything he's been through, you can't just say can't! I can't hear can't right now! You need to tell me something other than can't!" 

____

'Even Watchers are limited as to where we can go, Cisco. And what we can do. Unlike... you.' _He heard a smile in her voice, clear as day._ 'You are so much more capable than you think. The fact that you found me, here, says far more than you realize. Do you have any idea how rare it is for someone with your abilities to be able to do what you are doing right now? Cisco... of the two of us, the one who is the most capable of saving your husband... is you.' 

____

“Me?” _He asked, and if he'd had a mouth it would have gone dry._ “But I don't know h-” 

____

'Don't worry, Cisco.' She said, her voice suddenly a soothing warmth throughout his not-form, 'I'll show you the way. But after that? Well,' _The darkness around him began to fade completely, the blue light expanding and swallowing the black entirely, swallowing_ him _whole,_ 'The rest is up to you...'

____

_And there was no chance to respond, no voice left in him to even try. Just light, and blue, and a sudden weight to all his limbs as the world suddenly fell back in on him, the Watcher's voice echoing inside his skull, words bouncing around in languages he shouldn't understand but knew completely. Then he was falling. Out of himself, back into himself. Tumbled through and dragged among the stars, an unwilling passenger on a runaway train with no breaks. Flying colors and far too loud roaring winds made it hard to focus on much of anything for far longer than a moment. And then... stars. Cloudless nothing, glittered with galaxies. Asteroid belts, and silver dust faded in and out of view till... a blink had him falling into a split in space itself, a bright and glowing four pointed tear._

____

_Once inside, there was no hard fall, no heavy landing. No strange, dizzying, alien setting._

____

_But an office. One he recognized._

____

_Harry's old office, in S.T.A.R. Labs, on Earth-2. But... different. Darker, somehow. And in shambles. Like it had been ransacked, but ages ago._

____

_And sitting there behind a debris littered desk with his head in his hands was..._

____

“HARRY!” He sat up yelling, then cringing as pain shot through his whole body. Caitlin pulling a needle out of his neck and Barry holding on to him, Maggie was standing at the foot of his gurney with her hands gripping her messenger bag, tears streaked down her cheeks.

____

“Cisco! Woah!” Barry blurted, and Cisco gripped onto both of his friends for dear life as the pain that radiated from his back nearly instantly incapacitated him.

____

“Hold on to him,” Caitlin ordered, moving toward a tray near his bed, reaching for a needle.

____

“No!” Cisco blurted, wincing as pain filled tears filled his ears, “Harry... I saw... I saw him!” He managed to get out, and everyone in the room got still and quiet, glancing at Harry across the way.

____

“Cisco,” Caitlin began softly, moving toward him again.

____

“Just, listen,” Cisco closed his eyes, clenching his jaw as she took his hand. He let out a few solid breaths before opening his eyes and meeting Maggie's still wide eyed gaze. “I talked to the Watcher.”

____

“What? When?” Barry asked in true Barry fashion, slowly helping to ease Cisco back.

____

“Just, ah...” Cisco let out a slow hiss as his back met the bed behind him, then sighed, “Just now. And she told me... how to save Harry.” He looked over at his still comatose husband the same time Maggie did. “I have to vibe him back...” He said, giving a stern nod. “And soon. Because it's bad, guys.” He let his eyes wander to Caitlin, then to Barry. “He's trapped, in a really bad place. He was supposed to be safe, but...” He shook his head slightly, a few tears finally escaping, both from his own pain, and the knowing, “I have to save him.”

____

“I am so confused right now.” Maggie mumbled lightly. And Cisco could tell by the looks on Barry and Caitlin's faces that they were confused, too.

____

So, when Jesse, Joe and Iris joined them, he explained. All of it. In detail, or as much as he could manage.

____

He had to admit, it sounded nuts. But nuts was par for the course, especially lately.

____

Once everyone was on the same page, they were all quiet, just exchanging glances, the same subtle determined look on their faces. They knew they couldn't stop him from doing this. They all knew how dangerous this was going to be, considering it had taken Caitlin injecting him with pure adrenaline to yank him back from this latest vibe walk. And they all knew that if they were in his shoes, they'd risk it all, too.

____

Because for him, it was beyond personal.

____

They all sacrificed for one another. They risked their lives for each other, came to the edge of death for each other more than once. And he knew that everyone standing in the room with him would do so again without hesitation for Harry. Because Harry was their family. Harry had proven himself over and over again, relentlessly, with so much heart and courage that he was irreplaceable to all of them. And just seeing it, knowing it made Cisco's heart surge with love for all of them.

____

But this was his husband. The man who had yet again thrown himself at the wolves so that Cisco and others could live.

____

And if it was the very last thing he ever did, Cisco Ramon was going to make damn sure he returned the favor...

____

**Author's Note:**

> (To be continued...)


End file.
